Can't Stop....Won't Stop!

I wish I woke up every morning with an unbridled sense of motivation and boundless energy. But, I don't. I have to drag my arse outta bed wake up a little bit and have my Shakeology before I'm ready to do anything. Shakeology then conquering. That being said, I've NEVER been into fitness until recently. I literally dressed down for gym in school, went to roll call then pieced out of there! I hated comparing myself to others..trying to run the track and being in last, huffing and puffing while it seemed effortless for others. UGH. Being a Mom completely changed me. It wasn't an option to be lazy anymore and the only person I had to "compete" with was my budding little babe, who was all too fast out maneuvering me! Not to mention that I did NOT want to be the fattest Mom at the park. I know I know, I shouldn't compare myself to others...but, don't act like you've never done it! So, I am on Mission HOT MOM! hahaha. Even for me sometimes it's really hard to find the motivation to workout. Some days I just feel plain blah and try to tell myself all the excuses of why it's okay to skip the workout. Yesterday was one of those days. I put it off all day. I was exhausted, had a headache, and a sore throat...I told myself I would just make it up on Saturday. Then it was like the classic angel and devil on my shoulders! The part of me that's SICK of being Fat said, "Hey lazy ass! Where has your lazy assedness ever gotten you??? Huh?? What does it accomplish? Don't you have goals to reach??? ARE YOU THERE?? Oh, no?? Are you gonna get there doing NOTHING??? The workout is only 25 mins girl...it will be over as soon as it starts just get it done already! NO EXCUSES!" The lazy fattie in me really had no rebuttal. "...." So, I threw on my workout clothes. Popped in my T25 Cardio DVD and pushed play before I changed my mind. But, I didn't just do it to do it..following the motions yadda ya. I freakin NAILED IT! I pushed myself so hard and even when my legs were on FIRE and I thought I was going to throw up I.PUSHED.EVEN.HARDER! It felt amazing! I was in BEAST MODE baby. Sweat was flying off me and I was watching my form and bouncing boobies in my window and I was WONDER WOMAN! I might have even cried a little...

My point here is this: It's freaking hard. It sucks sometimes. I see this saying going around;

It's spot on. Some days you just don't want to. So, you have to talk yourself into it. Because tracking your calories, making healthy choices, and working out is HARD I'm not gonna lie. But, feeling guilty cause you gorged on pizza, having to wear your baggy pants cause you're feeling huge, and feeling like your body doesn't fit your personality is HARD too! Choose your hard.

Calling all K-9's come over for a DogVacay!

I'm really enjoying doing this in-home pet boarding! It's like getting to have a temporary pet without the full-time responsibility! My 3 year old son Logan is such a super helper too! He know to not open the door unless the doggie has a leash on and he helps with potty breaks, walks, and throwing a ball around the yard! Just another thing I am doing as a stay-at-home/work-at-home Mom to supplement our household income.

You never have to go to a kennel again! Check out my home dog boarding profile on DogVacay.com and use my coupon code FRIENDSFUREVER to get $10 off your first booking.
http://dogvacay.com/pro/FriendsFurEver

Before And After....and then kinda sorta back to before.

This is about accomplishments...and failures. Achievements and setbacks. It's about lesson's learned...regrets...and moving forward...chuggin along, even if your choo choo get's derailed.
I'm real. I like that about myself. I like that characteristic in other people as well..which means even if I am ashamed about some things, I can face that and share with you.
Last June (2012) I had been working hard to lose weight for 4 months. I went from 203 to 168. It was a really exciting time for me. My before and after picture was being shared all around facebook. I felt really good about myself and I was finally getting into shape!





Well, as my confidence was growing, my fiance's was depleting. He wasn't working full time, we were struggling financially and he didn't feel like he was full-filling his responsibility of man of the house. He felt like a failure, and the more successful I became the more it dampened his spirit. Even though he was excited for me, and very supportive of my weight loss, it just ultimately led to us needing a break. He moved out at the end of August. A girlfriend of mine with a young daughter moved in.
And then things proceeded to come crashing down. I wasn't good to myself. I had been with Jeremy for 4 years and the break-up just tore me apart. I thought I was doing the right thing...but, at the same time I felt so wrong. I was drinking too much, not working out, not taking care of myself. Eating whatever was around (which usually wasn't healthy)...my roommate literally ate Sour Punch Straws as meals.
So out went my support system...in came a horrible influence..and nothing in my life was better at all.
I started rapidly gaining weight back..and the more I gained, the more depressed I got, the less I took care of myself. It was just an awful viscous cycle and completly opposite of the routine I had gotten myself into before.
  I knew something had to change again. I didn't really want it to be over with my ex.. I just wanted to scare him into getting his ish together... Probably better ways of going about it. But, between the time apart, and living with a volatile negative person.. I learned a lot.
   A lot of decisions I made when he was gone..and she was here were very uncharacteristic of me...and I thought it would be "Fun" but... every single day I felt like a shitty awful human.
  Jeremy and I stayed in touch cause we have a son of course. Come January..with the new year we couldn't stand to be apart anymore.
 We had learned a lot of lessons. We had been through A LOT of bullshit. Nothing was better for either of us apart...and we KNEW we had to make our family work.
    We'd sit and talk, and comprise, work on our communication...and started rebuilding.




4 months to lose the weight...4 months to gain almost all of it back from 168 to 196..NOT the kind of before and after you want to have... and another 4 months of getting life figured out and my Choo Choo back on it's tracks. I stopped trying and stopped coaching because I was so ashamed that I had gained and that I no longer looked like the after picture that was being shared of me...

I can now honestly say... even though I am not where I want to be financially or physically I'm getting there. I'm working hard at it. I'm devoted and committed to my dreams and to my family. A lot of people don't agree with my decision. But, it's MY life. I'm living it. I know us, him..better than anyone else. Every relationship has it's issues....it's figuring out who's worth fighting through those issues with.

I'm back to a routine of working out and eating healthy. I'm coaching others and helping them achieve results. Jeremy is working full time and we completely support each other. We're happy.
We're really really happy. Lesson learned Past shit forgotten and forgiven. Time to keep moving forward! Time to let go of the guilt I have over the past year and weight gained and total set back I've found myself in. You don't hear about set-backs a lot. I mean...we all know how Oprah yo-yo'd like CRAY. But, I'm here to say...even if it's embarrassing I'm a little grateful for my setback because it taught me what is really truly important.
Health
Happiness
Family
Love

Time for a new 'C'!?!

Back in August I actually got myself down to 189lbs. That's 11 lbs less than when I got pregnant. Then I heard through FB about my friends wife doing Beachbody. I was intrigued so, I asked for more info. Well at that point in time money was really tight and I really couldn't see justifying the cost (regret). In between August and Feb (6 months) I gained again and was back up at 203! So, I decided cost didn't matter.. I needed to do something for myself..for once.

I committed to taking a 90 day fitness challenge with 5 other like minded individuals. In just four days will be my 8 week weigh in! But, I stepped on the scale this morning (cheater!) and I am officially at EXACTLY 20 lbs lost!!! Not bad for less then 8 weeks eh?? I got so excited and felt so great that I have been sharing my results. Just sharing my results is getting others interested and now I am a Beachbody coach! Me?? A fitness coach? Say what. Whowhoddathunkit? So, even though I am personally still on my fitness journey I am now helping others get started on their own! The best part?? It holds me even more accountable to stay on track. Drink my Shakeology (healthiest meal of the day) meal replacement shake every morning, do my at home fitness dvds (Turbo Jam Woot!), eat healthy and produce results! I love it. Never have I been more committed to a healthy me.

I've started my own challenge group of 5 now and the results of my first group buying there challenge packs equaled a nice little commission for me, paying for my next month supply of shakeology and a bit of money in my pocket too! I am in love with my morning shake. I went with Vegan..yes vegan, Tropical Strawberry. Throw a half a banana and some orange juice in there. You got a tasty breakfast smoothie! So, yes call me Coach Cassie! The best part of my new JOB is inspiring others and helping them loose weight too! Take care of your self, take care of your health! http://beachbodycoach.com/MommaCass

  Check out my coach site. If I can do this anyone can really. I mean, everyone knows the financial struggles we have been going through. So, if we can front the starting cost.. so can you! 

C is for Circle Time

Considering my playroom has attracted myself a full house of other peoples kiddos in Auntie Cassie's Daycare (that's right AC/DC), I decided I had better find some structured activities to keep them at bay.. I mean entertained. Cause I can only listen to so many non relateable stories..and provide my own body as a jungle gym for so long before my eye starts to twitch. Glory and it's name is the Internet. YouTube, google, blogs, Pinterst, so much inspiring ideas on the ole WWW.
     The kids love it when I turn a paper plate into a work of art and love to learn a new song. Even Logan has gotten so well at sitting in his spot at circle time!
     
     I just wanted to share the two ideas we have done recently.
                    Sunshine Circle Time

• I put 4 paper plates together and cut the edges to look like sun rays. 
• Each kid got to color their own sunshine and put a face on it.
• We attached some hemp to the back so they could slip it on their hand.
• I taught them the Mr. Golden Sun Song. It goes like this: 

 Oh Mister Sun, Sun,

Mister Golden Sun,

Please shine down on me

Oh Mister Sun, Sun,

Mister Golden Sun,

Hiding behind a tree...

These little children

Are asking you

To please come out

So we can play with you

Oh Mister Sun, Sun,

Mister Golden Sun,

Please shine down on me!

Oh Mister Sun, Sun,

Mister Golden Sun,

Please shine down on me

Oh Mister Sun, Sun,

Mister Golden Sun,

Hiding behind a tree...

These little children

Are asking you

To please come out

So we can play with you

Oh Mister Sun, Sun,

Mister Golden Sun,

Please shine down on...

Please shine down on...

Please shine down on me!

      Monkey Circle Time

• Taught the kids the 5 little Monkeys Song. It goes like this:

Five little monkeys (Hold up five fingers.)
jumping on the bed. (Jump up and down.)
One fell off (Hold up one finger and then roll your hand down towards the floor.)
and bumped his head. (Tap your head with your fist.)
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said, (Put your pinky to your mouth and thumb to your ear like a telephone.)
"No more monkeys jumping on the bed!" (Put one hand on your hip and wag your index finger.)

Four little monkeys (Hold up four fingers.)
jumping on the bed. (Jump up and down.)
One fell off (Hold up one finger and then roll your hand down towards the floor.)
and bumped his head. (Tap your head with your fist.)
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said, (Put your pinky to your mouth and thumb to your ear like a telephone.)
"No more monkeys jumping on the bed!" (Put one hand on your hip and wag your index finger.)

Three little monkeys (Hold up three fingers.)
jumping on the bed. (Jump up and down.)
One fell off (Hold up one finger and then roll your hand down towards the floor.)
and bumped her head. (Tap your head with your fist.)
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said, (Put your pinky to your mouth and thumb to your ear like a telephone.)
"No more monkeys jumping on the bed!" (Put one hand on your hip and wag your index finger.)

Two little monkeys (Hold up two fingers.)
jumping on the bed. (Jump up and down.)
One fell off (Hold up one finger and then roll your hand down towards the floor.)
and bumped his head. (Tap your head with your fist.)
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said, (Put your pinky to your mouth and thumb to your ear like a telephone.)
"No more monkeys jumping on the bed!" (Put one hand on your hip and wag your index finger.)

One little monkey (Hold up one finger.)
jumping on the bed. (Jump up and down.)
She fell off (Hold up one finger and then roll your hand down towards the floor.)
and bumped her head. (Tap your head with your fist.)
Mama called the doctor and the doctor said, (Put your pinky to your mouth and thumb to your ear like a telephone.)
"Put those Monkeys straight to bed!" (Put one hand on your hip and wag your index finger.)

• Then we did a worksheet with pictures and traceable words. "Monkey", "Bed", "Five", "Doctor". 
• Then the kids got to make their own Monkey.
• I was also going to make Monkey bread but, with early pick ups I am just gonna save it for Monday.

If you have any kids songs or activities for Circle time you'd like to share I'd love to hear them!

Catching Up

Craziness. I don't even wanna go on and on about all that has happened since the last blog I wrote about Halloween. So the highlights are:

• We moved to a sweet Cozy home in Edmonds. So nice not living in someone's basement and construction project anymore. We live in a great area and are getting a killer deal on rent. We even scored a free washer and dryer off good ole craigslist.
• Christmas. The usual. Family and food and fun and presents.
• Snowpocalypse. It sure dumped and dumped. We were out of power for 4 days and had to stay at my brothers (our old place) in Seattle. 
• Potty training. Maybe we'll get more into this later. For now it's really more of a parlor trick. And came a long with a visit to the ER after little man decided his penis was a new found fun play toy.
• We sadly lost Jeremy's Uncle Steve to cancer. It was really hard on Jeremy. In his death he left us a bit of money that allowed us to pay some rent in advance and get a nice little cushion and also treat each other for Valentines day.
• Life. Ya know. Living it on the daily. After the move my fiance's insurance changed and he had some issues picking up with anxiety meds. Him without them is like a bomb with no fuse just blowing up at the slightest little spark. Sometimes though fights happen... and they even need to. We got into a fight that turned just into a really good talk. It's all about communication. I love that man of mind even when he's crazy. 
• I am about to start a fitness challenge. I am super excited. It's through beachbody. I'll be doing shakeology and working out to turbo jam. I'm ready to have a great success story!

Well, that's just about it. Took awhile for us to get Internet hooked back up. Now, that it is I hope to get back to blogging and hope to entertain you. :)

Candy!

Our Halloween started with pumpkin carving! Yes, a bit behind but, it didn't stop us and Logan sure loved to stick his hands in the cold pumpkin goo. Last year may have been Logan's first Halloween. But, this year was the first time he got to Trick R Treat! We dressed him up as super hero Batman, Daddy was a punk rock clown, and mommy was a referee. Hey why not right? I play referee pretty much on the daily. "Stop hitting!" "Share the toys!" "Tiiiiiiiime OUT!".  This time I was clad in costume! Our first stop was Trunk or Treating in Mountlake Terrace. Cars line up and decorate their trunks and hand out candy. We knew it would be a safe and easy alternative for Logan. Although he didn't feel like walking his little batman boots himself he still really enjoyed it. He even really got the hang of it and yelled out something in the form of baby gibberish that might as well have been "Trick r treat" and reached in candy bowls to select his treat (usually tootsie rolls). After that we hit up the brand new Dick's Drive in to get our budget burger fix! Went home and grabbed our wagon and hit the neighborhood before calling it a night. Logan sure loved to knock on the door and yell until the candy came out. He even invited himself into a nice old ladies house! After we got home we checked out his treat haul and put our little bat boy to bed. Now we have way more candy than anyone in this house needs. But, holiday traditions are so much fun and so important to me! Hope you had a happy Halloween!